June 22, 2025 | Day 3
Sunday, June 22, 2025 | Day 3
Salem, Oregon
Once upon a time Jonny and I were broke newlyweds. I was 22, Jonny 25. I graduated university two months before our wedding and was unemployed the first ten months we were married (though during this time I did odds and ends to help Jonny with his photography business, including producing stock photo shoots he was contracted to shoot).
When we first were married we rented a 1-bedroom ADU on a friend’s property for around $800/month, which felt like a lot. After we were there for 8 months they put their home up for sale and we moved out. We then rented another friend’s townhome for 3 months before he decided to sell the property. We didn’t feel we could apply to rent at an apartment complex because we didn’t have enough savings to cover application fees plus first and last month’s rent. To make things more complicated, we needed a 2 bedroom place because Jonny’s younger sister, Lanessa, was going to move in with us for her senior year of high school. With a long list of wants and short on change, we turned to Craigslist.
One night Jonny was the first to respond to a Craigslist posting for a daylight basement apartment within our budget (but way at the top of that budget) that was located in Happy Valley, Oregon and featured a shared sauna, pool and hot tub. It seemed too good to be true. While I was at work the next day, Jonny went to tour the property. He called me after and said he didn’t think I would like it because the homeowners live upstairs, the shared laundry room was downstairs in our unit, the kitchenette was small and while it had a full-size fridge, a sink, and electric stovetop, there was no oven. On top of all that, the stairs connecting the two levels didn’t (yet) have a door to separate the units. Apparently Eloise, the homeowner, had a long list of interested parties waiting to see the apartment, but she was willing to wait until after I had seen it and made a decision, before she would show it to anyone else.
I remember vividly walking to the apartment’s sliding glass front door. Eloise warmly greeted me by name and immediately explained that the slider’s door handle was a bit janky so they were going to get us a new handle and keys made. She showed us around the apartment and kept saying things like:
“When you move in you can use whatever furniture is in here, or we can help you move it out.”
“Feel free to paint, the space is yours.”
“You guys can use the pool whenever you want! Do you have family in town? Please invite them over.”
“This is a great little closet for your shoes.”
And
“I want to make sure you feel you have privacy, so we’ll work out a laundry schedule so you know when to expect me and I’ll stay out of your way.”
Eloise definitely spoke as if we had already agreed to move in. When Jonny and I got back into our car, I immediately asked if he was certain we could afford the apartment, because I really wanted to live there. He was surprised I liked it so much, and felt good about it too, so when we got home he called Eloise.
Jonny and I spent our first wedding anniversary moving into Eloise and Joe’s apartment and the rest is history. We lived there for over 5 years. If we hadn’t moved to Toronto, I’m sure we would have started our family there, and probably would have moved out only because Eloise and Joe sold the house.
Eloise and I never did make a laundry schedule, and I never once felt like we didn’t have privacy. If anything, Jonny and I were invasive of their space and time - and they always welcomed us into their world with love. Whenever I needed to bake something, I’d use their oven upstairs. Eloise and Joe tolerated our ever-present parade of house-guests and live-ins, which included 3 of Jonny’s siblings and our buddy Marc. Shaun built out his first Sprinter van in that home’s driveway. They let us eat whatever we wanted from their huge garden which included an array of vegetables, raspberry bushes, blueberry bushes, and a plumb tree. When Jonny was building his aerial photo and video business, Fly View Aerial, he traveled a lot. When Jonny was gone and I got lonely, I’d pop upstairs and visit with Joe, Eloise, and Lois (Eloise’s mother). They would watch our pet rabbit when we weren’t home. Eloise invited me to be a part of her book club. They included us in family dinners, birthday celebrations, and we attended their son’s wedding and daughter’s baby shower. They are our chosen family. Our kids now call them Grandma Eloise and Bapa Joe. Lois is Grandma Grandma.
Jonny and I have wonderful parents whom we love dearly and who still guide and nurture us. How fortunate we are to have stumbled upon a third set of parents. Eloise and Joe were there for us through some really rough times. They were emotional, and sometimes financial, support as we established our businesses and grew as individuals. We laughed and cried together. We’ve never forgotten the chance they took on us - we moved in without background checks, and only the first month’s rent.
We live in Happy Valley now, and I frequently drive past the home we once shared with Eloise and Joe. While I love where we’ve landed, I miss that home. I miss the sense of community, the open-mindedness, the acceptance we felt every day. Joe and Eloise have always treated us with respect, even when we were still kids. They make the people around them feel important and loved. I’ve witnessed them forgive over and over again. They are generous, understanding, and interested. I’ll love them forever and I’m so glad they moved back to Oregon from California. That twelve hour drive was too far for my heart.